By Ernie J. Zelinski
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Retirement Sayings

Statistics about Retirement

and Life in General 

(A Comprehensive Collection of Quotes and Sayings

about How Statistics Apply to Retirement and Life in General)

Old Folks  

Death is one of the leading causes of statistics.
— Unknown wise retiree

Surprisingly, 39.2 percent of all statistics about retiring happy are made up on the spot.
— Unknown wise retired person

Statistics are no substitute for common sense.
— Unknown wise person

If enough erroneous data is collected, most things can be proven statistically.
— Unknown wise person

Statistics can be used to prove that the probability of something happening is inversely proportional to it not happening.
— Unknown working person hoping to retire at 60

Exactly 56.78 percent of statistics about whether to retire early are not as accurate as they are deemed to be.
— Unknown retired person

People can come up with statistics to prove anything. Over 14 percent of retired people know that.
— Unknown soon-to-be retired person

If you believe all the statistics about retirement that you hear and read, you probably won't retire. Heck, you won't even get up in the morning.
— Unknown retiree

91 percent of statistics is crap and nothing else.
— Unknown senior grouch

There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies and statistics.
— Benjamin Disraeli

If you won't find what you want to know about Social Security and having a happy retirement in the Bible, you will find it in Shakespeare. And if you won't find it in Shakespeare, you will find it in How to Retire Happy, Wild, and Free.
— Dave Erhard

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Statistics show there are three ages when men misbehave: young, old, and middle.
— Unknown wise retiree

Statistics show that an average of 39,000 people are killed by gas annually. Sixty inhale it, forty light matches in it, and 38,900 step on it.
— Unknown wise person

Statistics show that men who kiss their wives in the morning live five years longer. So do people who have read How to Retire Happy, Wild, and Free.
— Very wise retiree

If people were as religious as statistics show them to be, we could get along with fewer police.
— Unknown retiree

Statistics are like witnesses — they will testify for either side.
— Unknown retired person

Facts are stubborn, but statistics are more pliable.
— Unknown wise retiree

Statisticians collect facts, then draw their own confusions.
— Unknown senior

Statistics can be used to support just about everything — including statisticians.
— Unknown wise working person


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At least 230 percent of statistics about retirement are exaggerations and the other .005 percent are understatements.
— Anonymous person in retirement

He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts — for support rather than illumination.
— Andrew Lang

Statistics are like a bikini. What they reveal is suggestive, but what they conceal is vital.
— Unknown retiree

According to the latest statistics, there are ten million Americans who aren't working. And there are even more if you count those with jobs.
— Unknown wise working person

Retirement statistics taken in moderation, cannot hurt anyone.
— Unknown retiree

Five out of four retired people are confused by statistics about retirement.
— Anon retiree

Statistics show that in 1940 each car on the road had an average of 2.2 persons; in 1999 it was 1.4. At this rate, by 2020 every third car on the road will be empty.
— Unknown wise person

We have statistics to prove that locomotives aren't the least afraid of automobiles.
— Unknown wise person

Like dreams, statistics are a form of wish fulfillment.
— Jean Baudrillard


NOTE: Also see Teacher Retirement Quotes and Funny Retirement Quotes.



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by Ernie J. Zelinski — All Rights Reserved
Author of The World's Best Retirement Book


 I will do today
what others won't,
so I will have
tomorrow what
others don't.
— John Addison
No organization — government or
otherwise — can take great care of you in retirement.     Organizations aren't capable of this — only  you are!
— from Life's Secret Handbook

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Surveys of seniors overwhelmingly      suggest that higher incomes don't drive satisfaction in   retirement. That said, there is a minimum
of income required to enjoy retirement.
— Dan Richards
I'm regularly asked     what my [retirement]  plan is, and I    deliberately don't have much of a plan. I've had lots of plans in my life and it might be nice to have a period      that is less planned.
— Malcolm Hamilton, Expert on Pensions 
& Retirement Planning

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